BAMAKO, MALI — In an act of noble pity for his fragile nation, Mali’s military ruler Assimi Goita has generously announced he will step down by 2030, if the country still exists.…
Uncategorized
TWITTER — Elon Musk has issued a desperate plea to Nigerians: stop tagging him in your NEPA (Nigeria’s old electricity authority) complaints, he’s not your president. “Sorry, but tagging me 800 times…
SERENGETI — A male lion in Tanzania is reportedly no longer gay, thanks to a groundbreaking conversion therapy program led by a self-proclaimed Kenyan “animal behaviorist” who also runs a church and…
Burkina Faso President to Criminalize Skin Lightening, Cites Melanin as National Asset President Ibrahim Traoré has announced a controversial new policy: anyone who lightens their skin could face prison time. “Melanin is…
ACCRA, GHANA — In a bold move to fight corruption, Ghanaian politicians have formed a coalition armed with just two tools: prayer and fufu. “Corruption must be fought unconventionally,” said coalition leader Ken…
The time of fake online faces is over — say hello to “what we checked vs. what we got.” JOHANNESBURG, SOUTH AFRICA — To stop heartbreak before dates, a group of sensitive…
Zimbabwe — With Pride Month boycotts sweeping the United States of America, the company has been forced to send pallets of unsold Pride merchandise to impoverished tribes in Africa. International aid workers…