TWITTER — Elon Musk has issued a desperate plea to Nigerians: stop tagging him in your NEPA (Nigeria’s old electricity authority) complaints, he’s not your president.
“Sorry, but tagging me 800 times a day won’t bring back your electricity,” Musk tweeted. “I’m not your president. I don’t run NEPA. I don’t even run Nigeria although, based on your mentions, I probably should. Also, I don’t donate to countries. Especially not ones where the donation might be last seen at a fuel station in Abuja.”
Nigerians quickly responded on Twitter and the reactions were as electric as their grid wasn’t. “Elon, you didn’t have to be so mean,” tweeted @oyinkan_45. “Our leaders are useless, yes, but must you compete with them?” “Now that Elon has finished us with insults,” added @SolaAlimi, “maybe we’ll stop begging billionaires and start bothering our own president if we can find him.”
Experts now warn that Nigerians may earn a new global ranking, not for GDP, but for Premium Begging on Twitter, narrowly beating out Sri Lankan crypto bros. “Musk was right to block them,” said Dr. Adeline Udeh, a visiting professor of International Twitter Diplomacy at Harvard. “Let’s see how they convince a government that owes NEPA to fix NEPA.”
The Nigerian government, true to form, responded with its greatest skill yet again: absolute, unwavering silence. When pressed for comment, one unnamed official replied, “The president cannot respond to tweets at this time. There’s no light in Aso Rock.”