Politics

Zebra Crossing in Lagos Officially Declared Decorative

LAGOS, NIGERIA — Officials from the Federal Road Safety Corps (FRSC) have confirmed that zebra crossings across Lagos are “merely decorative,” and that pedestrians should use them strictly at their own risk.…

Cecilia Abena Dapaah

Ghanaian Politician Returns Loot After Watching Nollywood Movie

ACCRA, GHANA — Former Minister of Sanitation Cecilia Abena Dapaah has reportedly discovered she has a heart — after watching a heart-wrenching Nollywood film. Sources say Dapaah was watching the movie Helping…

President Donald J.Trump in the white house

Trump Says Epstein Killed Himself Because He Had No Clients

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a bizarre statement, President Trump claimed Jeffrey Epstein killed himself because he had no clients. Trump said that, as a world-class businessman, he knows how to spot great…

President Ibrahim Traore

Burkina Faso President to Criminalize Skin Lightening

Burkina Faso President to Criminalize Skin Lightening, Cites Melanin as National Asset President Ibrahim Traoré has announced a controversial new policy: anyone who lightens their skin could face prison time. “Melanin is…

Ghanian man praying

Ghanaian Politician Says he uses Prayer to Fight Corruption

ACCRA, GHANA — In a bold move to fight corruption, Ghanaian politicians have formed a coalition armed with just two tools: prayer and fufu. “Corruption must be fought unconventionally,” said coalition leader Ken…

Nigerian Ministers

Nigeria Appoints Minister of PowerBank

In a bid to curb Nigeria’s perhaps most critical issue and challenging crisis, which is adequate power supply, the Nigerian Government has announced the appointment of a Minister of Powerbank. Nigerians have…